Something Isn't Right
by glen125th
Summary: Something isn't right at Camp Green Lake: girls? The D tenters think they've scored until they realized they're being visited by Camp Lesbos [named after a Greek Island]: a camp full of lesbians. What are boys with raging hormones to do?
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: I don't own Holes by Louis Sachar but I do own the OCs.**

**A/N PLEASE READ BEFORE CONTINUING: All right, so there's going to be heavy slash and femslash so if you don't like it, don't you read it and flame me. Lesbian and gay relationships will be present and I'll try my best to not make any slurs. I'll edit something if informed that a word or phrase etc is derogatory. This is all good-hearted fun, nothing is meant to be taken into offense. So please R&R and enjoy.**

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**Something Isn't Right: Prologue  
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The Warden boredly looked over the slips of paper in the suggestion box; Mr. Pendanski insisted that if she at least read and considered some of the things the boys had to say, it might make things a little more fun.

"It's not supposed to be fun around here!" she yelled at him. But he told her in his annoyingly calm voice that listening to what others want could make a cause for the better.

She opened up the first piece of paper. _ "Get some chicks." _

She rolled her eyes and threw it aside, opening the next one. _"God made women and men. Too many men here. Need women."_

"Ugh." Opening the next one: _ "To raise up the temperature at Camp Green Lake, please get some girls."_

The next ones were highly detestable.

_"Save a Squid, fish some girls." _

_"Let me put my x-ray vision to good use by getting some girls."_

_"Let me use my magnetic fingers to see if the girls are wearing metal bras."_

_"We need somebody in this place to actually wear deodorant." _The Warden sighed, hoping somebody was just suggesting buying deodorant when she read the last line. _"Namely girls."_

_"If you really do have cameras in the showers and tents, please let us watch the videos if you get hot babes here."_

_"Don't make me barf anymore by seeing the same old geezer here all the time." _She hoped he was talking about Mr. Sir when yet again, her wish was crushed by the last line. _"Please invite a camp full of gorgous chicks or at least get a newer, hotter, younger Warden. That's a woman of course. PS: please let her have nice boobs this time. The one we have now..hers are saggy and nasty. That's why I'm always sick. Thank you."_

The Warden screamed with fury, throwing the suggestion box at the wall. The D-tenters have been having far too much fun with this box. They wanted hot, young girls? They'd get their wish.

Calming down she dialed the number of the nearest girl camp. "Hello? Kathy? Yes, how would you like to stay for about a month of two here? A vacation? Something like that..."


	2. Hallucinations

Disclaimer: I don't own Holes.

A/N: The Greek Island, Lesbos, is not fictional, just to inform.

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**Chapter One: Hallucinations  
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Boobs. Hips. Glossy, combed hair. Makeup. Long, slim legs. Feminine, slender arms. 

_What the hell?_ X-Ray blinked as he groggily came out of his tent, lethargically buttoning up his orange jumpsuit. It was 4:30 on his watch and it was never wrong. Was he dreaming? He saw faces of about thirty five gorgeous girls staring back at him, waiting outside the Mess Hall. But then again, he couldn't really see—he hadn't put his glasses on yet. He sighed wearily to himself, feeling quite foolish.

"Mornin' X," Squid yawned, pulling a shirt over his head. "What's the matter? Looks like you've just seen a ghost."

"Trust me…" X-Ray said, shaking his head, "I saw something and it's been gone long enough to be a ghost."

Chuckling, Squid left the tent with Zigzag but came back no longer than ten seconds later, screaming: "I think the rest of the camp became really hot girls!"

At once, X-Ray jumped, shouting, "I knew I wasn't seeing things!"

Barfbag grabbed X-Ray but the shoulders, scowling, "You saw them and didn't tell us?"

"Look, I didn't have my glasses on. Do ya think I want to go up to some cute blonde chick to find out it was the Lump? 'Course not."

All seven boys poked their heads out one by one to ogle at the perfectly formed girls.

"Juvenile female delinquents," Magnet smiled. "Just the thing this camp needs."

"Wait, wait, wait," Barfbag laughed, shaking his head. "How do we even know they'll be staying here?"

Zero pointed out to Mr. Sir talking to a tall and slender dark-haired woman who was older, nevertheless, just as breathtaking as any of the other girls.

"Don't suppose—" Zigzag started until the morning horn sounded, causing all the girls to scream and squeal.

The beautiful Warden of their camp turned around and shouted aloud to her campers, "All right, girlies, say hello to your new home for the next two months!"

"Well boys," said X-Ray, rubbing his hands together. "Looks like this breakfast is going to be very interesting."


	3. Lesbians of Camp Lesbos

Disclaimer: I don't own Holes except for my OCs.

A/N: This might start out a bit cliche-ish (sorry, I think I spelled that wrong) but heck, don't worry, they're lesbians, so none of that dreaded Mary-Sue stuff will be going on. This chaper might be a bit confusing, but all the lovely lesbians will be a bit more properly introduced in the next two chapters.

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**Chapter Two**

"Why do you think we're coming to this camp?" the small, curly redhead girl named Tara asked her friends on the coolly air-conditioned bus. It was a bright and sunny day—another scorching day, actually and the girls had been informed that they were to be visiting another camp; one full of boys.

Camp Lesbos, an all girls detention camp for lesbians (named after a beautiful Greek island, mind your naughty brain), was informed by their Warden, Miss Kathy, a beautiful, young woman with long black hair, fair skin, and dark eyes, that they would be going on a field trip. Everybody was quite surprised. Visiting another girls camp wouldn't be too awful surprising, it would actually be a lot more exciting and enjoyable for them, but they had been told that they would only be informed the purpose of this trip once they got to Camp Green Lake.

"It's not like we're actually going to be interested in them," the leader named Leslie said, as she played with her girlfriend's, Alex's, wavy brown hair.

"I know," Alex whined, pulling a loose thread from her black, kinky tank top. "They're probably all going to think we're from that dreaded Mary-Sue camp down the lane. What if one of them…flirts! What do I do then!"

"Then," said Leslie, tucking a strand of blonde hair behind her ear: "you'll cover yourself up a bit more. I mean, c'mon, you look great and all, but those boys might see it as an open opportunity that you're trying to get their attention."

"Don't worry about it," said Pat, a mannish, African-American girl with blonde cornrows. "If any of 'em give you trouble, I'll pound 'em—or if they give Sherrie crap to deal with either." Pat didn't have a girlfriend in her own tent; she had one in A-tent and actually preferred it that way.

"But still," complained Tara, leaning against Dionne comfortably. "I really don't know what do say to a boy if he tries to flirt with me."

"Say you're already with somebody," Dionne, the more feminine African-American girl said protectively." Giving Tara a kiss on the forehead, all the other girls smiled and stretched out contentedly.

"What about Janie and me?" a pale girl named Sam asked, looking at her quiet girlfriend.

"I'm sure you'll be fine," said Leslie, punching Janie playfully in the arm. "Any of them pressure you or make you feel uncomfortable, you tell Pat over here straight away, got it?"

Janie smiled and nodded, clutching her dark blue backpack closer to herself.

"Or you can tell me," said Sam, kissing Janie's cheek. "Because if anybody makes you feel bad, tell me and they'll be pissing in a bag for weeks!"

"I think that covers all our problems, eh?" the blonde leader checked over and they all agreed that they would look out for one another.

"Still," said Alex dreamily, "I wished we could've gone to visit a Mary-Sue camp…they're really hot."

"Am I not good enough for you, sweetie?" Leslie asked her girlfriend, going in for a playful kiss.

"I didn't say that, I'm just saying those Mary-Sues might be a heck lot more kissable," she replied teasingly.

It really was a lot more fun being apart of Camp Lesbos than Camp Mary-Sue.

A few hours later, the girls could feel the bus coming to a slow halt in front of a dry, dusty campground. Pressing their faces against the windows, they looked outside. It was still very, very early, but if they positioned themselves just right, they could properly see boys still sleeping in their tents.

"What time is it?" Sam yawned, stretching.

"Four AM," Janie replied, taking a glance at her pink watch.

It was still a bit dusky outside, not one boy seemed to stir at the sound of the cooling engine.

Just then, Miss Kathy strolled up to the front of the bus and began to speak once all the girls were awake.

"Now listen, girls," she began, putting on her cowboy hat. "I've been invited here by a very good friend of mine name Lou Walker—"

"Is she your girlfriend!" a girl named Reggie shouted from the back.

Miss Kathy grinned and said, "Can't say she ain't cute."

Whooping and hollering escaped the girls' mouths as their Warden became pink and laughed. "That's enough ladies. Now, just to let you know, we're at Camp Green Lake."

"It ain't green and it ain't got no lake. Is this a camp for the boys with mental disabilities?"

"'Course not. Lou told me it was an all-boys detention camp for gays. No different from all of us, so you be nice. We're gonna have to act like the men here—she says they're all just a bag of fruity cupcakes. Don't be too harsh on them, ya hear?"

"Oh wow," said Alex, her eyes growing round with interest. "If I had any idea, I wouldn't have brought pepper spray."

"Told ya there wasn't anything to worry about," said Leslie, taking off the top of her orange jumpsuit and tying the arms around her waist to reveal a yellow wife-beater.

Jamie looked quite relieved too and began to relax a bit.

"Now, we're having breakfast here, but not for another half hour. We'll be sharing it with the boys and follow the usual schedule of digging our holes. Get up, line up, and please don't be too rowdy. Don't want to scare our little fairies off."

The girls laughed a bit as they boarded off, taking their backpacks with them. They waited outside a big building that read "Mess Hall" as Miss Kathy greeted a scary looking man with a cowboy hat in front of it.

The moment he saw her, his eyes became big and he shook her hand, saying, "Mr. Sir…pleased to meet ya. Heard a lot about you from the Warden. Didn't expect to see such a womanly…woman. If there's anything you need—"

"Yes, thank you…um…is Lou around?"

"She's still sleeping."

A horn went off, sending all the girls screaming in surprise. "What's this!" Miss Kathy yelled above the noise, covering her ears.

"It's only the morning alarm! All of the boys are about to get up soon!"

While they talked and the horn died down, a boy stumbled out of a tent marked D, looking half blind. At once, all the girls turned around and saw him, saying, "Look! A boy! It's a boy!"

"Looks like he's in our group!" breathed Sam, noticing the tent name.

His eyes widened and he froze for a moment, like a scared rabbit and ran back in the tent. No more than a few minutes later, two other boys, undoubtedly lovers, came out and also saw the girls. Instead of freezing in place, they scurried back in the tent and there was a considerable amount of screaming heard.

"Oh. Well then…girls! She turned around to Camp Lesbos and said, "Welcome to your new home for the next two months."

"Be careful, girls," said Leslie, raising her brow mischievously. "We don't want to make the wrong impression."

Unfortunately, the girls already had a wrong impresson themselves.

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A/N: Hmm...so the boys think the girls are straight and the girls think the boys are gay...oh my, please R&R.   



	4. Love or Friendship

**Chapter Three **

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The Warden smiled as the looked at the boys excitedly take their seats at breakfast. They sure didn't know what they were in for.

"I was plannin' to keep this a secret," said the Warden, smiling mischievously at the boys, "but I guess it was a little too obvious."

"You rock!" A boy from B tent shouted.

She let out a small chuckle and said, "I know. I've been reading the suggestion box and I decided you boys deserved this." They didn't know she meant that in the bitterest way possible.

As the Warden droned on, Zigzag looked over at the area marked "Girls D", this curiosity overpowering him. At once, he made eye-contact with a girl; fair skinned with curly red-orange hair and small brown eyes. She had sleek, high cheekbones and a slim nose. She was one of the smaller ones in the group, but obviously a heck lot more mature. The girls were wearing the same orange jumpsuits as the boys, only wearing t-shirts, tank tops, and wife-beaters. This particular girl was wearing a dirty white one with clunky, black skate shoes. She shot him a friendly smile and focused her attention back on the Warden.

Tara looked around the Mess Hall at the boys nudging each other and whispering. Yup, they were definitely gay. Especially that one kid with the wild, frizzy, blonde hair…he was staring but instead of making her feel uncomfortable, she looked him right back digging into his stormy blue eyes. At first, she uncomfortably thought that he was checking her out, but the announcement came back in mind.

_He's GAY! _She told herself amusedly, cracking a smile. A pink tinge appeared in his cheeks. _I guess he knows I knows…poor fellow…might be one of those guys who still don't want to admit it yet. _

She decided silently to herself with the often sideways glances that she gave him that she'd get to know him better and hopefully counsel him into knowing that it was really all right to be homosexual.

"Psst, X," Zigzag nudged the leader. "I think I'm going to score that girl over there."

"Which one? There are a lot if you haven't noticed."

"The cute one. She's been smiling at me all through breakfast."

"Which one! As long as it isn't that sweet lookin' one over there." He jerked his head back to slim pale girl with wavy black hair and brown streaks, large blue eyes, pink lips, and slightly large front teeth. She had diamond-cross earrings and a tight, black tank top. She wore more makeup compared to her friends when it came to the black eye makeup and X-Ray never missed an opportunity to wink at her.

_Wink, wink, wink_ went his eye all through breakfast and she seemed to be responding quite well. She'd lean over to her Asian friend (particularly close he noticed) with the long black hair and they'd look around, then at X-Ray and giggle.

_I am such a stud, _the leader of D-tent though to himself as they waved at him from across the room.

"Check out that guy," Janie whispered to her girlfriend. She pointed across the room to an African-American boy with thick glasses.

"Isn't that the dude from earlier?"

"Yeah…I think he has something in his eye."

"Oh, no, that _can't _be it!" Samantha exclaimed quietly. "He's obviously winking."

Janie raised her eyebrow and said, "He's gay, Sam. Don't you remember? He wouldn't be making that suggestive of a sign…unless he was bisexual or something."

"I didn't mean that," Sam said, heaving a sigh. "Look behind us!" There was another boy, one from A-tent, who was smiling at something across the room. Tracing his stare, it led back to the boy from D-tent (they didn't know he was smiling at some girl in the lunch line who happened to be standing behind X-Ray).

Janie grinned and rolled her eyes. "I got so nervous for a second there. Hmm…but they really don't make a cute couple, do they?"

"Nope," Samantha agreed, picking at her cereal. "But hell, as much as they're free to be gay, they're entitled to their rump-buddy."

All the others were also busy trying to make their impression on the girls as they left the Mess Hall to start their holes for the day. The boys giggled and waved at the girls, who stayed completely indifferent to them.

"Man, are _they _playing hard to get!" X-Ray heard a boy for E-tent sigh.

It was true. It had been the boys the whole morning who were trying to get the girls' attention and not once did they walk over to them. It was disappointing. They were all good looking girls—except for a few that appeared to actually be quite manly and scary.

Armpit had taken a sudden fancy to one of the muscular girls that happened to be in D-tent. She was about 6'3 feet tall and African-American. She had blonde cornrows and her arms were burlier than any other boy at that camp. Her hands were like paddles and they were rough with calluses covering the palms of her hand. Her face was square, her eyes were small, her nose was a bit flat and squashed in, and her lips thick and full. However, this was the kind of girl Armpit has dreamed about.

Pat noticed the fat African-American boy in the group seemed to be having trouble talking to the Hispanic one.

_I'm thinkin' somebody has a little crush, _she laughed to herself as the fat one beamed.

The Hispanic one was chatting away and the African-American one was nodding intently, paying close attention to each word. He was obviously infatuated.

Camp Green Lake seemed no different than Camp Lesbos so maybe playing some match-maker would be fun.

"My advice," said Magnet, "just talk to her. She don't seem like the kind of girl that gets a lot of attention from the fellas so yeah, I think she'll respond real well."

"Ya think?"

"Do I look like an idiot?"

"No… but dude, is she smokin'!" Armpit whispered loudly to Magnet as she rammed the shovel to the hard ground, immediately going about a foot down.

"She's kinda scary," Magnet shuddered. "Are you sure that's even a girl?"

"Heck yes! She has womanhood written all over her!"

"She looks like a friggin' transvestite!" Magnet said rather loudly. This caused a few of the lovely D-tent girls to turn around and grunt with disapproval.

"I don't care what you say, man," Armpit said, becoming nervous as she looked in his direction. Her presence was intoxicating. In his eyes, she was as perfect as any girl from Camp Mary-Sue…but to the others, she was as scary as King Kong.

Meanwhile, Magnet was busy making eyes at the other African-American girl who was much more feminine and cuter than the manly one. She rolled her eyes and Magnet purred, studying her.

Yes, she was more of a girl. This one had lighter skin that the "man-woman". She had delicate curves, a very voluptuous body, and long, black hair. Her eyebrows were perfectly formed with high arches, lip gloss shined her lips, and dark brown eyes peered suspiciously through long lashes.

He was watching her dig her hole.

_That's right chica, bend for papa…_Magnet thought dirty little thoughts to himself, becoming excited.

She seemed to sense somebody was looking at her when she turned around.

"Hey," he said coolly, leaning on his shovel.

"Hey," she smiled back.

"You look nice."

"Thanks."

"I really like your makeup."

"Thanks."

This boy was especially weird compared to his friends…giggling. That's all he did the whole day—that is, other than watching her of course. It was creepy and at first she thought he might've been sent to this gay camp by mistake when he told her she had nice makeup.

_I was wrong about him, _Dionne said to herself. _All he wants is to learn how to put on makeup. I'll help this future-drag queen out a bit…won't hurt and it might be fun. _

"Maybe we can hang out sometime?" Dionne said wiping a bead of sweat from her forehead.

Magnet giggled idiotically and nodded, watching as she shot him a smile, saying, "I'd talk to ya know, but buddy, I have to finish."

Starting to dig his hole again, he gleefully thought about how he was going to sit next to her at dinner.

Squid hovered over the Spanish girl's hole while she dug underneath the hot sun that tanned her skin. He watched her with sneaky prevented eyes and she dug the shovel into the soft earth. He had noticed her being obviously the pretty one in the group. She felt a shadow cast over her and looking up, she saw Squid grinning goofily from ear to ear.

"Whaddya want cowboy?"

"Your name," he said, jumping into the hole next to her.

She gave him a strange gaze and studied him a bit. Suddenly, a lovely smile spread across her delicate lips and she played with her dark brown hair. "Alexandra," she said, her voice deepening a bit as she took his hand to shake it. "But you can call me Alex."

Now, he was evidently the good-looking one in the group so Alex considered herself lucky. Not only was she the gorgeous girl of the group, she was also prone to being jealous, proud, flirtatious (only to girls though), and at times, a bit greedy. She knew she was beautiful so she only expected the good looking boy of the tent to approach her as well.

_Wow, what a waste of manhood… if I weren't dating Leslie and he weren't gay, we'd so be making out in this hole right now. _

But hey, become close friends with this boy was better than nothing. She gripped his hand and shook it, introducing herself as Alex.

"Oh my," Squid yelped, flinching a bit. "Quite a grip you've got there, Alexan—uh, Alex!" He took in her figure greedily with his eyes—her

"Thanks," she chuckled, spitting her white wad of gum into her hole. "I'll see ya around, man. Leslie's watching…" she cocked her head to the side, knowing how suspicious her girlfriend could be even when it came to boys.

"Oh…okay," said Squid, looking at Leslie. She was probably one of those girls that didn't trust boys. He shook it off. Compared to the rest, he was feeling rather fortunate.

The rest of the boys were beginning to believe that they were having just as much luck as the others did.

Barfbag had an interest to the tall blonde girl with dark eyes and a wide smile but she seemed far too interested talking to her friend that had just introduced herself to Squid. Barfbag shrugged; taking glances at her often while she leaned against her hole to take a sip from her canteen

Without so much as even looking at him, the blonde girl screwed the cap to the canteen back on and swallowed her water, saying, "What do you want?"

Barfbag jumped slightly, embarrassed at being caught. She seemed to be scolding him.

Regaining his composure, he said, "Um…nothing."

"Don't give me that," she said, still not bothering to glance at him. "I know you're staring for a reason.

……

This boy seemed to have a hard time just trying to talk. "It's nothing…more of a personal thing actually…entirely personal."

"What would that be?" Leslie asked.

"I told you it was personal."

"Oh c'mon now. You were staring quite rudely. Must have something to do about me."

He paused, closing his eyes to summon up all the courage. He was tightly gripping the handle of his shovel.

_He has a problem with lesbians! _Leslie came to that awful conclusion after he said, "I'm just not used to having…you know…around here. If you haven't noticed."

……

Barfbag wasn't sure if she was just trying to act ambiguous but she didn't seem to notice that they were girls in an all-boys camp.

"No, actually, I don't know," she said defiantly, throwing her shovel aside. She jumped out of her hole and stood over Barfbag who began to feel very frightened. He seemed to crumble through her intimidation and she heaved a sigh.

"C'mon, cupcake," she growled. "Spit it out."

He lowered his eyes once more, looking more demoralized than ever.

At this point, not even the united powers of all Four Founders could have prevented

Perhaps he had picked out the wrong girl. He was always bad at making choices; that was one of the reasons he was at Camp Green Lake.

The blonde girl threw a handful of dirt into his face and jumped back into her own hole, obviously now in a bad mood.

He heard a laugh come from behind him as he spit out the dirt. There was a cute Asian girl with long, black hair and big black eyes. "I think she likes ya." (She meant that in a friend sort of way, of course, but Barfbag didn't know that)

"She feisty, isn't she? I don't know if you're joking, but I think I've already made a new enemy."

"Don't even try to make the first move, bud. Leslie's the type that'd kill you as soon as look at you. Give it time. She might warm up at dinner."

Barfbag beamed. "Really?"

"Yup."

He looked around and said, "Yeah…so, you find anybody interesting?"

"Yeah," said the girl, leaning casually against her hole. "That one kid right there."

……

Janie pointed across the wasteland to the curly-headed boy. He was interesting. He did seem a little gayer than the others and she really did want to make a new friend. He seemed just her type. She liked making new friends and she felt as though becoming friends with a gay boy would lead to a fun opportunity to share their stories about how their friends and family reacted to their "coming out of the closet".

"Zero?" the boy that smelled of sour milk laughed.

"Zero?" Janie raised an eyebrow and smiled. "I've noticed that ya'll have your nicknames."

"Yeah, I'm Barfbag."

"Well, Barfbag," said Janie, "if you can get me to meet that Zero kid, I'll get Leslie over there to talk to ya."

"Really?" He brightened up a bit.

"Yeah, why not? We can all forge some allies here. So tell me about that Zero guy."

"I'm tellin' ya, he won't be easy to talk to. He's real quiet and doesn't talk to anybody. Might be hard."

"Can't be that hard. I'll kick his ass if he so much as ignores me."

"You know you used to be like him too," said Alex from her hole. She had obviously been eavesdropping. "Quiet and easily beat up. Not till Sam came along."

Barfbag raised his eyebrow. "Sam?" he asked, not knowing she was talking about a girl. "Who's that?"

Janie blushed. "Oh, you know…my significant other."

"Ah…do they do to this camp?"

"Yeah…"

"Then why do you wanna meet Zero?"

"Cause he seems cool."

_I really ought to look out for this one, _Barfbag thought wearily to himself as Janie gave Zero a wave. _She's a vixen this one is._

……

All the girls had finished digging their holes just as fast as any boy which surprised all of them. The Wreck Room was particularly crowded as the D-tent boys watched Pat and Armpit play around a bit.

She punched his arm and he yelled out, "Ouch! Watch it, girl! I bruise."

"C'mon, one hard punch in the face!"

"You're basically asking to be killed here!" said Squid, momentarily distracted for a second from his conversation with Alex.

Armpit rolled his eyes, but before he knew it, Pat had him in a headlock. A smile crept along his face despite the pain.

"If you don't fight back, I'm accidentally going to rip off your head!"

Before he could help himself, she elbowed her right in the stomach and she toppled over. He guiltily looked around as his friends stared at him wide-eyed.

"Ooh, Pit, you just pushed a _girl…_"

But Pat jumped up t her feet again and laughed, obviously pleased. "That's more like it. It's good to know one little fairy boy can do the trick."

The boys looked around, confused, but shrugged it off, continuing their conversations.

……

Miss Kathy was walking around the campsite, hoping that the Warden would come out to talk about anything when Mr. Sir came up from behind her, holding a bouquet of dandelions.

"Just thought you'd like a little welcoming gift," he said gruffly, scratching his greasy brown hair under his cowboy hat.

She smiled at him and said, "Why thank you. Lou would love them, wouldn't she?"

He stared at her then replied, "Well, yeah, I guess so…they're her favorite."

"Excellent. Thank you Marion." With that, she stalked off to the little cabin that rested under the shade of the only oak tree in Camp Green Lake.


	5. Sour Shower

Disclaimer: I don't own Holes.

**A/N: This is going to be a short yet fun (I hope) chapter...very dramatic...for the boys at least. Please R&R**

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**Chapter Four **

Around eight o'clock, right after dinner, Alex had a hard time finding the showers, eventually learning that if she just followed the sound of running water, she'd make her way.

Two of the six showers were already occupied by boys in C-tent named Snake and Easy. She stopped in her tracks and paused momentarily but shrugged it off, remembering that they were homosexual. She freely took off her clothes and stepped into the shower beside them, not wanting to come across as a loner.

"Hello boys," she greeted, letting the cold water dampen her curly brown locks. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

They didn't hear the last part for they were far too busy ogling at her. Seeing that they had nothing to say slightly annoyed her but she began looking for the soap. After looking around in vain, but finding none, she asked Snake, "Um, excuse me, where's the soap?"

There was once again no answer. She looked down over at their stall and her eyes widened, seeing the white bar sitting patiently, waiting to be used. It was more than half gone and Alex, being the girly girl that loved to keep clean, was disappointed.

"Is that all they've got around this place?" she asked them with displeasure.

"What are you talking about?" Snake whimpered, alarmed as she placed her hands on her feminine hips.

"I mean _that,_" she snapped, pointing down. "I mean, just look at it! It's tiny!"

Snake looked down between his legs, thinking he knew what she was pointing at and felt as though he were about to cry. "It gets bigger—I swear!"

A bit confused, but nevertheless feeling her PMS kick in, she hissed, "In case you haven't noticed, that's impossible. This is a detention camp, not a magic show. It's shrunken down! Practically useless! Nobody's even going to see it."

Easy began to laugh, but Alex glared at him, saying in reply, "The same goes for you! I bet yours is just as bad—maybe even smaller. I came here to be satisfied; not be disappointed with the miniature things! Just wait till the others hear…"

They both flushed with embarrassment and quickly begged, "Please don't! We can satisfy!"

"Unless you get bigger ones around here, I'm filing a complaint to your Warden about not supplying me properly." Alex looked down again at the measly bar of soap and she stepped out of the shower and the water automatically shut off. She pranced away with her straight nose in the air, still quite irked with her PMS and the shortage of soap.

Once she was out of sighed, the two boys looked at each other in frustration and humiliation. Their showers had long been shut off, but they were too beat down to move.

"I never thought anybody would actually point it out," Easy sniffed, wiping a tear away from his eye.

"You should talk," his friend replied, looking more depressed by the minute. "Our tent lied to me. They said they didn't call me Snake for nothing."


	6. Talking Peppers

**Disclaimer: I don't own Holes, sadly.**

**A/N: Sorry it took so f-ing long to update...summer school was bad and I'm busy with many other stuff...but I did miss writing about the lesbians. Please R&R! **

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**Chapter Five **

Squid was lying on his stomach on his cot, propped up on his elbows and resting his chin on his knuckles as he moved his legs back and forth in the air, sighing aloud to his friends, "Gosh, Alex sure is pretty, ain't she?"

"She may be the prettiest, but they're _all _pretty," X-Ray corrected. "I think I'm seriously going to hook up with Samantha…I think she's into me…she was pointing me out to her friend at breakfast."

"It's THOSE EYES!" Zigzag interrupted quickly. "That's all that's attractive about her. She looks dead and her front teeth protrude more than that Snake fellow down in C-tent when he's in the showers, if you know what I mean."

"That was gross, man; we _didn't_ need to know that."

"Still, I'm telling you," the blonde boy shrugged. " Tara is much damn pretty and mature compared to those other girls."

"Since when do _you _like girls like that? She looks like she's five! Sick pedophile you are, Ziggy," Magnet retorted, lying back in bed. "I mean, that Dionne girl is a sweet look chica, c'mon, cuán hermoso es ella? Not as hot as that Alex girly Squid claimed, but Alex is whorish looking. And besides, none of us got as close as Pit did to she-man…though not in a good way."

Barfbag was busy tending to Armpit's black eye. "Jesus Christ, that Patty girl sure kicked _your _ass."

"That's why you _never _call her Patty or Patricia. But she does it rough and I like it rough. Hell, what about you and that one chick?"

"Leslie? I dunno…I don't think she likes me much…"

"No, dumb ass, not Leslie, the other one you were talking to," Squid snapped, taking away his hands from his face.

"Oh." Barfbag wrinkled his nose and shrugged as he pressed the icepack against Armpit's eye. "Janie. She doesn't like me either. She likes Zero, she told me."

The test burst into a fit of laughter as the small, curly headed boy turned a deep red. He did think Janie was cute; not "hot" or "sexy" like her friends, but cute. He liked that—gave her a charming sense of innocence.

"But!" Barfbag yelled over the screams of amusement, "I think she already has a boyfriend."

Silence came over them just as quickly as the laughter did.

"What the hell?" Zigzag asked, his stormy blue eyes widening.

Barfbag shrugged. "Anybody know a guy named Sam at this camp?"

Thoughtful gazes spread across all their faces till Zigzag said, "Think that kid in C-tent…ya'll know Tick Tock? Think that's Sam, dunno though."

It was getting painfully obvious that this conversation was getting to Zero, so they quickly steered away from the topic.

"I miss Dionne already!" Magnet sighed.

"And I never got my goodnight kiss from Alex."

"You mean the slutty looking one."

"Shut up, bitch."

"Okay."

"If you miss her so much," X-Ray said, "go see her. And as for _you! _ You march right over there and get what belongs to you."

The two boys couldn't resist. It was against the rules, not against the Warden's rules of course, but Miss Kathy's rules. Then again, if they _did _get punished, there was a good chance that Miss Kathy would be the one to punish the boys and she _was _an attractive woman.

Trouble or not, Magnet and Squid thought they couldn't lose.

……

"Are you sure this isn't a bisexual camp?" Dionne asked, running into the tent after Pat, both girls panting.

Pat nodded, still trying to catch her breath. "It…was…all too…obvious…earlier…"

Some boys had been chasing them around the camp for the last half hour for a kiss, a game it was, they believed.

It seemed to them that it was a game to the boys—"pretend you're heterosexual; it's a funny joke!"

Though Dionne and Pat couldn't see what they found amusing to the game, they admitted they had fun playing it too. It _was _amusing to see homosexual boys chasing around the girls, pretending they wanted a kiss. Then again, the catcalls and suggestive remarks were a bit annoying and nearly believable.

They sat down and began talking about who was the cutest, bitchiest, smartest, sexiest, or sluttiest girl at the camp.

"Have you seen Alex, though?" Pat whispered. "I mean, by the way she's acting, you'd think she was straight! We'd be in a lot of trouble if the boys weren't homosexual."

"What did you say about me?" the brunette girl asked, walking into the tent on her long, tan legs along with the rest of them.

Dionne and Pat turned red.

Alex smiled as she took off the towel wrapped around her body to change. "Don't worry about it. It's kind of fun, anyway. I think the Squid boy; you know the one who I think is dating Magnet or Zigzag? Yeah, I think he's doing the same thing…pretending he's straight. Sometimes, because of boys like him, I think I should become bisexual."

They started at her credulously and stopped in the middle of putting on their clothes to question her with their eyes.

"I was joking."

"Oh…but don't joke about that; we know how sensitive Janie is about…you know."

"Suck it," the Asian girl snapped. "So what if I'm the only bisexual girl in this damn camp?"

"We just want to make sure you're not going to cheat on me with some douche bag from Camp Green Lake that might so happen to be bisexual too," said Samantha, winking knowingly.

"Will you all shut up?" Leslie snapped, putting on a t-shirt to sleep in and a pair of white panties. "Who _cares _about boys? This is reminding me of the time we had to stay over at Camp Mary Sue for a pit stop. All they talked about was the cute boys they met at the other camps."

"You've been awfully snappy today, sweetie," said Alex, sitting down on the cot next to her. "We all saw you yelling at that one boy that smells bad."

"You did?"

They all nodded in unison as Leslie got up, embarrassed, to grab her pillow from her crate. "Ain't my fault. He was staring all rudely and I think he's got a problem with lesbians though he's a fag himself."

There was the sound of rocks scuffling outside and the girls stopped.

"What was that?" asked Tara, panicking.

Dionne squeezed her hand and replied, "Dunno…"

They hesitated before going on with their conversations.

Alex crawled to the end of the bed as Leslie bent down to pick up her hairbrush. "I think a good spanking is in order since you were so rude to our new friends."

Before anybody could let Alex's words sink in, there was a loud slap and Leslie screamed, straightening back up, holding her behind.

"What the hell was that for?"

"I just told you!"

The others laughed as Leslie grabbed her girlfriend's wet towel and rolled it up, whipping her behind with it.

"That should teach you!"

There was a muffled, "Oh yeah!" coming from outside, that sounded oddly like a boy.

Janie silently stormed over to the tent and pulled the flap back to revel a Hispanic boy and a white boy with brown hair and a toothpick peeking in.

Magnet had obviously become quite "excited" up to the point that it was impossible to hide and Squid was considerably red.

The girls screamed and hid for cover—most of them were half-naked, others without tops, and the rest, only in their undergarments, leaving Squid and Magnet, who were now lying on the ground, covering their eyes in hopes to make it "better".

Alex stormed over to them and hovered over their faces. Seeing that she had it under control, the others poked their heads out of their hiding places.

Squid and Magnet had heard it get quiet, so they uncovered their eyes and looked up, seeing Alex lingering above them. It was quite a shock actually, that she out of all the girls would do this seeing that she was only in her skimpy little black thong and bra.

Magnet could only goggle as a very "certain" part Alan's lower body suddenly became a "giant squid".

"Were you listening into our conversation?" Alex sneered while they scrambled to their feet, avoiding eye contact with her.

Squid was too busy trying to get his little friend back down so Magnet answered for the both of them.

"No, of course not, we wanted to say goodnight to you girls and…yeah…"

The rest of the D-tent girls emerged from their hiding places with blankets wrapped around them.

"That's sweet…I guess…"

Another body came through the tent flap and seeing what he saw; Mr. Sir began to yell so loud that nobody could even understand what he was saying, his Texas accent getting thicker and thicker.

Before anybody could even ask what in the hell he was talking about, he dragged the two boys out of the tent by the collar.

……

_Knock, knock, knock _

The Warden groaned to herself as she pulled herself up from the couch to stroll over to the door. She pulled back the frilly curtain and saw the smiling, pretty face of Miss Kathy.

"What?" she asked, annoyed.

The dark-haired Warden beamed, replying, "Oh, I was just walking around and thought you might need some company."

Thoughts whirled around in the Warden's head as the opened the door, allowing the other woman in.

"Here!" Miss Kathy shoved the bouquet of dandelions in the Warden's hands. "Heard they were your favorite; I just _had _to give them to you."

"Er…thank you…" She set them down on her kitchen counter and uneasily shifted around in her place as Miss Kathy grinned at her.

"Can I help you with anything else?"

Miss Kathy's dark eyes softened suddenly, as she began to move in, causing the Warden to gulp nervously and back away.

"We've been friends since we were little girls, haven't we, Lou?"

"Um, yeah, heh, I suppose," she replied, still backing away. "That's why I invited you here—"

There was a flash of delight in Miss Kathy's eyes and the Warden kicked herself for it. _Stupid, stupid! You already told her once that you didn't love her that way…way to hint…stupid bitch I am… _

She found herself cornered in the corner of her kitchen, backed away against the refrigerator, with Miss Kathy's lips nearly brushing against hers. Soft pink lips that wanted so badly to press against the thin chapped lips couldn't.

It would also be a funny sight for an onlooker. A beautiful, dark-haired beauty was being creepily aggressive to a scraggly haired woman with more wrinkles than there were holes at the camp.

Miss Kathy almost had her in her full control, lips nearly meeting.

"Lou!"

Miss Kathy and the Warden jumped as Mr. Sir barged into her house pulling Magnet and Squid by the collar and both of the immediately seeing the two Wardens against each other.

It was hard to tell who was the most surprised: Magnet, Squid, the Warden, or Mr. Sir. Miss Kathy, however, was just disappointed.


	7. Talking Peepers

**Disclaimer: I don't own Holes, sadly.**

**A/N: Sorry it took so f-ing long to update...summer school was bad and I'm busy with many other stuff...but I did miss writing about the lesbians. Please R&R! **

**

* * *

**

**Chapter Five **

Squid was lying on his stomach on his cot, propped up on his elbows and resting his chin on his knuckles as he moved his legs back and forth in the air, sighing aloud to his friends, "Gosh, Alex sure is pretty, ain't she?"

"She may be the prettiest, but they're _all _pretty," X-Ray corrected. "I think I'm seriously going to hook up with Samantha…I think she's into me…she was pointing me out to her friend at breakfast."

"It's THOSE EYES!" Zigzag interrupted quickly. "That's all that's attractive about her. She looks dead and her front teeth protrude more than that Snake fellow down in C-tent when he's in the showers, if you know what I mean."

"That was gross, man; we _didn't_ need to know that."

"Still, I'm telling you," the blonde boy shrugged. " Tara is much damn pretty and mature compared to those other girls."

"Since when do _you _like girls like that? She looks like she's five! Sick pedophile you are, Ziggy," Magnet retorted, lying back in bed. "I mean, that Dionne girl is a sweet look chica, c'mon, cuán hermoso es ella? Not as hot as that Alex girly Squid claimed, but Alex is whorish looking. And besides, none of us got as close as Pit did to she-man…though not in a good way."

Barfbag was busy tending to Armpit's black eye. "Jesus Christ, that Patty girl sure kicked _your _ass."

"That's why you _never _call her Patty or Patricia. But she does it rough and I like it rough. Hell, what about you and that one chick?"

"Leslie? I dunno…I don't think she likes me much…"

"No, dumb ass, not Leslie, the other one you were talking to," Squid snapped, taking away his hands from his face.

"Oh." Barfbag wrinkled his nose and shrugged as he pressed the icepack against Armpit's eye. "Janie. She doesn't like me either. She likes Zero, she told me."

The test burst into a fit of laughter as the small, curly headed boy turned a deep red. He did think Janie was cute; not "hot" or "sexy" like her friends, but cute. He liked that—gave her a charming sense of innocence.

"But!" Barfbag yelled over the screams of amusement, "I think she already has a boyfriend."

Silence came over them just as quickly as the laughter did.

"What the hell?" Zigzag asked, his stormy blue eyes widening.

Barfbag shrugged. "Anybody know a guy named Sam at this camp?"

Thoughtful gazes spread across all their faces till Zigzag said, "Think that kid in C-tent…ya'll know Tick Tock? Think that's Sam, dunno though."

It was getting painfully obvious that this conversation was getting to Zero, so they quickly steered away from the topic.

"I miss Dionne already!" Magnet sighed.

"And I never got my goodnight kiss from Alex."

"You mean the slutty looking one."

"Shut up, bitch."

"Okay."

"If you miss her so much," X-Ray said, "go see her. And as for _you! _ You march right over there and get what belongs to you."

The two boys couldn't resist. It was against the rules, not against the Warden's rules of course, but Miss Kathy's rules. Then again, if they _did _get punished, there was a good chance that Miss Kathy would be the one to punish the boys and she _was _an attractive woman.

Trouble or not, Magnet and Squid thought they couldn't lose.

……

"Are you sure this isn't a bisexual camp?" Dionne asked, running into the tent after Pat, both girls panting.

Pat nodded, still trying to catch her breath. "It…was…all too…obvious…earlier…"

Some boys had been chasing them around the camp for the last half hour for a kiss, a game it was, they believed.

It seemed to them that it was a game to the boys—"pretend you're heterosexual; it's a funny joke!"

Though Dionne and Pat couldn't see what they found amusing to the game, they admitted they had fun playing it too. It _was _amusing to see homosexual boys chasing around the girls, pretending they wanted a kiss. Then again, the catcalls and suggestive remarks were a bit annoying and nearly believable.

They sat down and began talking about who was the cutest, bitchiest, smartest, sexiest, or sluttiest girl at the camp.

"Have you seen Alex, though?" Pat whispered. "I mean, by the way she's acting, you'd think she was straight! We'd be in a lot of trouble if the boys weren't homosexual."

"What did you say about me?" the brunette girl asked, walking into the tent on her long, tan legs along with the rest of them.

Dionne and Pat turned red.

Alex smiled as she took off the towel wrapped around her body to change. "Don't worry about it. It's kind of fun, anyway. I think the Squid boy; you know the one who I think is dating Magnet or Zigzag? Yeah, I think he's doing the same thing…pretending he's straight. Sometimes, because of boys like him, I think I should become bisexual."

They started at her credulously and stopped in the middle of putting on their clothes to question her with their eyes.

"I was joking."

"Oh…but don't joke about that; we know how sensitive Janie is about…you know."

"Suck it," the Asian girl snapped. "So what if I'm the only bisexual girl in this damn camp?"

"We just want to make sure you're not going to cheat on me with some douche bag from Camp Green Lake that might so happen to be bisexual too," said Samantha, winking knowingly.

"Will you all shut up?" Leslie snapped, putting on a t-shirt to sleep in and a pair of white panties. "Who _cares _about boys? This is reminding me of the time we had to stay over at Camp Mary Sue for a pit stop. All they talked about was the cute boys they met at the other camps."

"You've been awfully snappy today, sweetie," said Alex, sitting down on the cot next to her. "We all saw you yelling at that one boy that smells bad."

"You did?"

They all nodded in unison as Leslie got up, embarrassed, to grab her pillow from her crate. "Ain't my fault. He was staring all rudely and I think he's got a problem with lesbians though he's a fag himself."

There was the sound of rocks scuffling outside and the girls stopped.

"What was that?" asked Tara, panicking.

Dionne squeezed her hand and replied, "Dunno…"

They hesitated before going on with their conversations.

Alex crawled to the end of the bed as Leslie bent down to pick up her hairbrush. "I think a good spanking is in order since you were so rude to our new friends."

Before anybody could let Alex's words sink in, there was a loud slap and Leslie screamed, straightening back up, holding her behind.

"What the hell was that for?"

"I just told you!"

The others laughed as Leslie grabbed her girlfriend's wet towel and rolled it up, whipping her behind with it.

"That should teach you!"

There was a muffled, "Oh yeah!" coming from outside, that sounded oddly like a boy.

Janie silently stormed over to the tent and pulled the flap back to revel a Hispanic boy and a white boy with brown hair and a toothpick peeking in.

Magnet had obviously become quite "excited" up to the point that it was impossible to hide and Squid was considerably red.

The girls screamed and hid for cover—most of them were half-naked, others without tops, and the rest, only in their undergarments, leaving Squid and Magnet, who were now lying on the ground, covering their eyes in hopes to make it "better".

Alex stormed over to them and hovered over their faces. Seeing that she had it under control, the others poked their heads out of their hiding places.

Squid and Magnet had heard it get quiet, so they uncovered their eyes and looked up, seeing Alex lingering above them. It was quite a shock actually, that she out of all the girls would do this seeing that she was only in her skimpy little black thong and bra.

Magnet could only goggle as a very "certain" part Alan's lower body suddenly became a "giant squid".

"Were you listening into our conversation?" Alex sneered while they scrambled to their feet, avoiding eye contact with her.

Squid was too busy trying to get his little friend back down so Magnet answered for the both of them.

"No, of course not, we wanted to say goodnight to you girls and…yeah…"

The rest of the D-tent girls emerged from their hiding places with blankets wrapped around them.

"That's sweet…I guess…"

Another body came through the tent flap and seeing what he saw; Mr. Sir began to yell so loud that nobody could even understand what he was saying, his Texas accent getting thicker and thicker.

Before anybody could even ask what in the hell he was talking about, he dragged the two boys out of the tent by the collar.

……

_Knock, knock, knock _

The Warden groaned to herself as she pulled herself up from the couch to stroll over to the door. She pulled back the frilly curtain and saw the smiling, pretty face of Miss Kathy.

"What?" she asked, annoyed.

The dark-haired Warden beamed, replying, "Oh, I was just walking around and thought you might need some company."

Thoughts whirled around in the Warden's head as the opened the door, allowing the other woman in.

"Here!" Miss Kathy shoved the bouquet of dandelions in the Warden's hands. "Heard they were your favorite; I just _had _to give them to you."

"Er…thank you…" She set them down on her kitchen counter and uneasily shifted around in her place as Miss Kathy grinned at her.

"Can I help you with anything else?"

Miss Kathy's dark eyes softened suddenly, as she began to move in, causing the Warden to gulp nervously and back away.

"We've been friends since we were little girls, haven't we, Lou?"

"Um, yeah, heh, I suppose," she replied, still backing away. "That's why I invited you here—"

There was a flash of delight in Miss Kathy's eyes and the Warden kicked herself for it. _Stupid, stupid! You already told her once that you didn't love her that way…way to hint…stupid bitch I am… _

She found herself cornered in the corner of her kitchen, backed away against the refrigerator, with Miss Kathy's lips nearly brushing against hers. Soft pink lips that wanted so badly to press against the thin chapped lips couldn't.

It would also be a funny sight for an onlooker. A beautiful, dark-haired beauty was being creepily aggressive to a scraggly haired woman with more wrinkles than there were holes at the camp.

Miss Kathy almost had her in her full control, lips nearly meeting.

"Lou!"

Miss Kathy and the Warden jumped as Mr. Sir barged into her house pulling Magnet and Squid by the collar and both of the immediately seeing the two Wardens against each other.

It was hard to tell who was the most surprised: Magnet, Squid, the Warden, or Mr. Sir. Miss Kathy, however, was just disappointed.


End file.
